I have started working on a new project. I'm calling it "Imperfect". I want it to be extremely detailed, not like anything else I have ever done before. I am going to attempt to paint it entirely in Photoshop. Full color with a background and everything. *gasp* Something totally new and different that I haven't done before.

I feel like it is the first real "art" piece I have done. It is not just depicting a character. It tells a story. It could be interpreted many ways. One focal point of the piece is a little girl, dressed in a cute party dress, kneeling on the floor and sobbing. I drew the little girl by hand and scanned her in. I think I'll see about posting it here later.

It's hard for me to keep up the drive to work on a project to completion. But this is a project that if I can finish it the way I would like, I want to have it printed as a poster and maybe even frame it for my wall. It has deep meaning to me. I came up with the idea during one of my low periods of depression.

So...look for more later!

Despite possible reports to the contrary... I am pleased to announce that I AM indeed alive and well. I may have disappeared from DeviantArt for awhile... I may have stopped drawing for awhile... But I am still here!

I've been going through a lot in the past few months. I finally found a godsend of a therapist and she has been helping me work through some deep emotional trauma and sort out my life. To outsiders it may seem like I have sunk deeper into the pit called depression. But the fact is, all my life I have been avoiding these issues and carrying them around with me. Now I am getting them out in the open and dealing with them. No more am I trudging along the same road, not getting anywhere. I have to take a few steps down to begin going through it all, so that I may lift my burden and begin, for the first time in my life, going uphill.

Wow, there's a picture in that I think... Hrm... *ponders that for awhile*

Ugh. I've been struggling with allergies for a couple days now. Sneezing a lot, and been super tired. I hope I'm not coming down with something. I have to watch my allergies cuz if I don't take medicine then they can lead to a sinus infection or something. *pops a couple more allergy pills*



I've started pulling out of my rut. Free writing is such a release. Sit down with a blank paper and a pen and just start writing everything that comes into your head. I love it. Think I'll do that again later today.

I have so much homework I have to do, I'm so far behind. I want to go play EverQuest, but I better go work on my homework. And hopefully get work done on my commission. I seriously need to get that done so I can take another commission or two.

*wanders off to go work on something*

I've really been feeling like crap lately. There has been one thing or another that has had me down, but I've gotten over that and felt better. And yet I still end up feeling like crap at the end of the day.

Part of my problem is that I've had a series of problems with my computer. I've been needing a new hard drive for awhile now. I've been hoping to save up money from a couple commissions to get a new one.

Well last week my monitor suddenly blew out on me. So I've gone from a beautiful 19" monitor to a tiny 14" monitor. Okay granted the monitor was very old. But I have been very upset by that.

And now... My printer has broken on me. It's been on the fritz the past couple days and I've been trying to fix it. I got on the phone with a tech support friend and we nearly got it fixed, but then it went back to the same problem as before.

And then as I was trying to fix it I took the back off to look inside it to see if I could figure out what was going on. When I closed it up again...2 seconds later the back popped off with a snap. I couldn't get it to go back on and then realized two tabs on one side that held it in place both snapped off at the same time. And that entire back piece is necessary for being able to cycle the paper through the printer!

So even if I were to figure out what was going on with the printer...it is now officially turned into a junkyard scrap all because two tiny pieces of plastic that are no bigger then 1/4 the size of a dime broke off.

So now I'm looking at getting a new hard drive, a new monitor, AND a new printer.

The worst part about all this is that I have nearly no money. I am going to college, and my Mother gives me a little spending money. I also get a little money from commissions. But I have a hard time getting those commissions done, so I MIGHT get money from a commission every couple months.

So I'm looking at living with a tiny monitor, no printer, and continuing to struggle with a tiny hard drive for a good long while.